Nobody wants to get this phone call, but it came last night. I heard about it this morning.

My cousin was sitting in his car with a friend and a drunk driver came careening into him from nowhere.

His jaw was shattered, half of his face lacerated, and he's pretty seriously hurt.

My aunt is heartbroken. Her youngest son is lying in hospital totally pulverised.

I .... honestly don't care.

This aunt of mine treated me like a poor relative when I stayed in her house.

This same aunt came to our house and called me a bastard and said that my mother and I would never amount to anything. Then she cursed me.

In spite of numerous efforts to form a relationship with her children my cousins, they all but acted as if I was invisible/transparent.

Now my whole family is giving me funny looks because I don't look the least bit concerned.

I know that this is a serious situation and I should be more forgiving but I don't know. It's not that I'm trying to make this situation about me because I'm not.

I'm not saying (or feeling) that her hurtful actions against me are more important than the fact that her son is currently fighting for his life. I do feel bad for him. He did not deserve this, and it only goes to say how negligent the authorities can be when it comes to cases like drunk driving. If there were better rules and stricter consequences put in place, perhaps drivers would have thought twice before getting behind the wheel in an intoxicated state. I feel bad for my cousin, I hope he recovers soon, and as for the drunk driver, I hope that he (if he does not serve time) can at least be sent for rehabilitation to Arista Recovery (https://www.aristarecovery.com/) or somewhere similar where he might learn to harness some of the control alcohol seems to have over him. That being said, I still do not feel any compassion for my aunt. I can't help but think that it is interesting that she could come here and say to me that my life is worthless and now her son came this close to losing his.

I'm not saying it serves her right. However, I am hoping that she will sue the drunk driver with the help of a personal injury lawyer so that my cousin can get justice. Maybe she will see it here about personal injury lawyers and contact them.

But my honest feeling is that I cannot feel the smallest bit of empathy for her.

And maybe this means I need to ask myself why I can hold such a hateful position, but this blog is a place to say how I truly feel.