I'm just about ready to give up. Why can't anything in this country be easy for once?

I went to the NYSC office this morning to register for that godforsaken program only to be told that they couldn't accept my transcripts unless they were stamped and signed by my school.

At first I wanted to scream "What the fuck does it matter?" It's not like they're employing me or anything but then I guess some people forge their transcripts or whatever (by the way who does that? I mean really WHO does that????)

The deadline for 'Foreign Trained' graduates (ugh, why do they call it that?) is in two days and it seems very doubtful that in that time I will be able to convince my school that NYSC really doesn't have an email address that they can just send it to and so they should do the eco-unfriendly thing by mailing my transcripts to me half way around the world.

I am sure that when I do finally get them and return to the dark and smelly dungeon also known as the NYSC office, they will proceed to ask me why the school on my transcript /degree is different from the one on my student visa, and after I explain to them that I transferred in my first year because I wasn't a fan of the area's propensity for life-threatening natural disasters and being told to go back to Africa by my illiterate Floridian classmates, they will ask me to submit a hurricane trajectory report from the national hurricane centre and a letter from Barack Obama saying this is so.

I suppose I should welcome myself back home. This is after all, Nigeria, the only country that uses technology to make people's lives more difficult.