The King and his men

Stole the Queen from her bed

And bound her in her bones

I'm on the verge of being in an affair with a married man.

I never thought I'd be in this situation, but I am.

Last night I dreamed Bakura's mother was holding a contest to find a suitable wife for him.

I came in last because I can't cook.

Another girl was picked but he eloped with me anyway.

Today I picked up the phone and called Bakura.

Today he told me that yesterday he did the introductions to be married.

He says there's a lot of pressure on him to get married.

He says he barely knows her............but

But her name is Aisha.

Aisha means she's Hausa.

She's a good girl. She'll make an appropriate wife.

It's all been arranged.

All he has to do is show up and get married and his family will be happy.

Two months ago he called and said he wanted to be with me.

Now I wish my name was Aisha too.

I'm gonna fuck you up

I'm gonna slit your throat

And then I'll tie you to the bed

And then I'll watch you choke

And when you hit the sack

I hope you think of me

Because I'm trying so damn hard

Just to let you breathe.....

I've cried already. For the first time ever he heard me cry. He was a bit surprised. I think inside he thinks I'm so numb that I don't feel anything anymore. Usually I'm on autopilot but this is Bakura. My Bakura. My flawed, imperfect, beautiful Bakura.

I haven't asked him why he doesn't just say no. Bakura has eight brothers. He doesn't have to get married, especially not if it's an arranged marriage.

Maybe I'm just saying that because that's the way it works out best for me. Maybe I'm selfish but he was fucking mine before bloody Aisha.

Is it wrong that I hate her already? She probably doesn't know anything about me. Fuck, she doesn't know anything about him; how the hell is she supposed to know about me? How the fuck do people agree to this shit?

Now I don't know who I hate more, her for being Hausa, or myself for being Igbo. Or maybe I just hate him for not saying no.

I got your photograph taped to the ceiling baby

I'm gonna jack my shit off, over it maybe

You were always on my mind

When your hand was down my fly

I've been afraid of turning twenty since I met Bakura. Twenty means it's time to get married.

Bakura is Twenty-seven.

I am here.

He is there.

Fucking Aisha is there too.

Is it wrong that I wish she'd trip and fall and land on a rusty old spear or something?

Is it wrong that I wish she'd get her very own private Hurricane Katrina to blow her into the fucking sea?

Well the dead can't make me quiver

Like you did inside me in your bed

And if I ever see you out with her

Just say goodbye

Because I'll smash her pretty face up

And I'll watch her die

I started running on Autopilot a long time ago. I'm permanently heartbroken.

I'm shackled to the King of Pain and he won't set me free.